Posts Tagged ‘food’
As I sit in my office, watching the birds and black squirrel eat from the birdfeeders; it reminds me of how I use to eat compulsively. It is amazing how after eight years of eating healthy and using quantity control it still bothers me watching others eat. I can never forget the fact my disease is doing push-ups in a corner and waiting for the right moment to act out with a vengeance.
I was thinking about this situation and realized I could continue being obsessed with the fact that watching the birds made me feel uncomfortable or look at the situation in a different way. I could watch the birds and appreciate their beautiful colors and acknowledge how lucky I am to have so many different types of birds in my backyard.
As far as the squirrel, named Oscar, watching him gave me motivation and confidence to pursue my dreams. Oscar is very persistent and never gives up until he manages to eat from every birdfeeder until they are empty. He appears early in the morning and gorges himself until he is full. Then he runs around, chasing the birds and disappears until evening. Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed with life I think of Oscar, how nothing stops him from finding food and always plays after he eats. I have been working hard this week inputting information into a database and at the end of the day felt exhausted. I got into bed one night and thought there had to be an easier way. I started thinking about Oscar and how persistent he was and always took time to have fun. Made a decision, I would be like Oscar, to continue pursing my dream and also take a mini-vacation every day at 3:00pm.
A mini-vacation is taking at least 10 minutes for myself to do whatever made me happy. By taking the time for myself eliminates stress and is a great motivator. Everyday at 3:00pm for at least 10 minutes I either took a walk, read a book or called a friend. It is amazing how much better I felt and had renewed energy.
What mini-vacation for at least 10 minutes would you like to take everyday? Please let me know.
In my office the desk and computer are in front of two windows. Last summer my husband gave me a beautiful gift by hanging birdfeeders in the trees directly in front of the windows. Now as I am working on the computer I watch the birds and squirrels eat from the feeders.
Each morning around 7:00am there are one gray and two black squirrels trying to eat from the birdfeeders. We have put up special feeders for squirrels and after they have devoured all the food they start on the birdfeeders. Even though some of the feeders are squirrel proof this does not stop them from trying different ways of getting at the food. It is amazing watching them not give up and keep trying. One morning I watched one black squirrel almost fall into a birdbath before running away and then within a few minutes he was back.
While watching the squirrels I keep thinking we are no different when it comes to getting what we want. Sometimes nothing will stop us from reaching a desired outcome and we will do whatever it takes to reach that goal. Other times in order not to reach a goal we will self-sabotage ourselves.
When working with my clients in reaching their goals, together we implement the following coaching process:
• Deciding what do you really want?
• Exploring what is stopping you from reaching your goal?
• Creating an action plan taking into consideration your goals and the tools for overcoming your self-sabotage behavior.
• Taking the action steps that will make your goal a reality.
Opportunity
• Make a list of a very small goal you would like to achieve within a month.
I would love to know your small goal. When I receive your goal I will send you a Daily Action Plan you can use to achieve your goals.
“We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves.”
– Orison Swett Marden
Whenever we have the thought, “When I lose weight, my life will be different” automatically puts your life on hold.
Are you willing to try a little experiment and see what happens?
• For five minutes each day, make a list of all the things you like about yourself.
• Continue this exercise for the next 21 days.
• Every Friday for the next three weeks email me at www.theloveyourselfcoach.blogspot.com five things you like about yourself.
It has been proven over and over again by making this list you will focus on your special qualities and start feeling good about yourself instead of waiting until you lose weight.
I tried this exercise for 21 days, my thinking changed and started to take better care of myself. At first it was hard thinking and writing, “What I liked about myself” and then as time went along it got easier. One of the tools that really helped me was a commitment I made to a friend, on Fridays I would send her my list. The first week was the hardest because I felt I was bragging about myself and when I got her email thanking me I felt better. The second and third week got easier.
Have FUN and together holding hands we will run down the path of SELF-LOVE.
April 5th
What I like about myself
1. I am very friendly and easy to talk to.
2. I feel very pretty and like the way I look.
3. I take very good care of myself by eating healthy and exercising.
4. I am a great coach and help women realize how fantastic they are.
5. I am working on being a better wife and partner.
Last Friday night I went to an Overeaters Retreat for the weekend and getting there was a nightmare. My friend and I left around 6:30pm and planned to arrive at our destination in about 45 minutes.
I have a GPS System; we put in the address and entered all the required information. The final step had a different address and neither one of us thought there would be a problem. So off we went following the directions. The GPS lead us onto a dirt road that had the same Street name we were looking for. We were commenting how easy it was to find the Camp. After riding for quite awhile in a wooded area at night in the Pine Barrens of New Jersey; we realized we were on the wrong road. All of a sudden the GPS System announced we arrived at our destination on the left. As we looked to the left we saw a tree. I never felt such panic!
We called 911, told the police our location, how scared we were and to please help us find the Camp. The Policewoman told us not to worry; she stayed on the phone with us and led us to our destination. If ever I thought there was someone watching over us it was that night. Now as I am thinking and writing about our journey, I can laugh.
What I learned from this experience:
• Never use the GPS System if it does not give you the right address.
• Have back-up directions.
• It is OK to ask for help.
• Trust that things will work out.
Once we arrived at our destination and listened to the keynote speaker, I felt relaxed. Then I got into bed and my fears went wild. I could not stop thinking about what could have happened instead of being grateful for the miracle of arriving safely. The next day I started journaling and speaking to many people about my fear based thinking. Nothing made a difference.
I made a decision, if I wanted to enjoy the retreat I would have to start thinking positively. A miracle happened, I was asked to lead a workshop on “Fears and How They Stop Us.” It was a great opportunity for me to explore my fears and learn what other tools people use to feel safe.
Some of the tools that were suggested are as follows:
• When having a fearful thought give yourself a big hug and say, “I am safe.”
• Journal or discuss your fears with another person.
• Remember that FEAR is “False Evidence Appearing Real.”
What tools do you use when you feel fearful, I would love to know.
Last Saturday morning, I was thinking about my day and realized we were going to a wedding that night. Dreadful thoughts over took me as I started thinking about all the food and having to watch everyone eat.
I have been in recovery from my compulsive overeating for over eight years. Every time I am invited to a party, I always start worrying about how I am going to handle the food. Usually as the day progressed I become more anxious and my fears turned to anger. I start to control everyone, telling them what to do and if they didn’t listen I would get angrier.
This time I decided this day would be different and I was not letting my fear of the food ruin my day. That morning my husband and I took a walk, as we were walking I told him how I felt. While I was walking the dreaded feeling started to disappear. By the time we returned from our walk I felt much better. As it turned out I had a pretty relaxing day.
My husband and I went to the wedding enjoying each other’s company instead of arguing. After the ceremony, my fears came true; we entered a room where there was enough food to feed more than 500 people. I left my husband and started to walk around the room looking for something I could eat. While walking around I started to talk to friends, family members and before I knew it they were calling us into dinner.
Once at the table, I felt much better because I could eat, dance and enjoy seeing my niece and her new husband enjoy their wedding. I ate what was on my food plan and felt fulfilled, powerful and grateful that my food monster did not take control of my day.
Some of the tools I use to ensure my food monster does not have power over my recovery:
• Acknowledge my feelings and talk to someone about them.
• Decide what I am going to eat ahead of time.
• If I want to eat something not on my plan, STOP, ask myself is this the choice I want to make and then take the appropriate action.
• ACKNOWLEDGE MYSELF!
What feelings do you have when you go to a party?
I am looking out the window, it is snowing and all the birds are at the birdfeeders eating. It just goes to prove that nothing can stop God’s creatures from eating even if it is cold and snowing.
On cold snowy days I always think about the times when my children were small and we would go sledding, have snowball fights and make a snowman. We had a great time and I was always thinking about what we were going to eat when we went inside. Once everyone was soaked to the bone, we went inside the house, had hot chocolate and ate everything insight. For dinner I always made meatballs and spaghetti. What fun we had!
After writing about the snowy days, I realized what an important part food played in my life. Food was my main focus all day and if I was not eating I was unhappy and worrying about everything. Thinking back makes me sad to think about all the things I missed because my main focus was on the food.
After struggling with food most of my life and riding the diet merry-go-round, I finally grabbed the gold ring and fell off. The gold ring was my commitment to do whatever it takes to live a healthy lifestyle and stop focusing on the food. Some of the tools I use everyday are:
• Whenever I want to eat something not on my food plan, I scream to myself, “One Bite Is Not Enough, I want four cakes to make me happy.”
• Remind myself I am important, loveable and cannot hurt my best friend, Helen.
• Remember I have received a special gift of eating healthy and can’t hurt people who are supporting me.
• Not to use food as an alternative. If I want to eat something not on my eating plan, don’t eat anything else and call a friend instead.
In the morning on New Years Day I was on the treadmill and heard that the number one Resolution for 2007 was to lose weight. If we support each other while on our journey of eating healthy and creating a vibrant lifestyle we can beat this food addiction together. I would love to hear from you and see what we can create together.
Thank you!
Helen
I would like to share with you an extraordinary experience I had last night. On Mondays at 3:30pm I meet my grandson, Jeffrey who is six years old at his school. Yesterday I asked him if he would like to go on a date with me for dinner. After going to the library and doing his homework, we drove to the restaurant. When I parked the car Jeffrey told me to wait in the car and he opened my car door. We went into the restaurant and he told the hostess where we wanted to sit. After deciding what we wanted for dinner, Jeffrey told the waitress what we both wanted. We had a nice time talking and eating, he paid the bill with my credit card. I thanked him for our date and we promised each other we would have another date on my birthday next month.
While Jeffrey and I were at the restaurant talking and eating, I was not thinking about the food on my plate. Once Jeffrey had placed my order with healthy choices, and then choosing how much food I was going to eat, I could enjoy being with Jeffrey instead of obsessing over the food.
The magic cure for me is to keep my commitment at every meal, I will only make wise food choices with quantity control. I have been following this philosophy for over eight years and find for me all it takes is focusing on one meal at a time. Once the food I was going to eat was on my plate, I could enjoy being with Jeffrey. WHAT A MIRACLE!!
I would love to hear about your extraordinary experiences and how food did not play an important role.
« Newer Posts
