Posts Tagged ‘positive thinking’
- Close your eyes and sit silently for a few minutes.
A thing of beauty
is a joy forever.
~ John Keats
Close your eyes and sit silently for a few minutes. Picture yourself sitting under a big tree smiling, and feeling relaxed. That is a thing of beauty!
We continuously have a choice to either feel good about ourselves or be our own worst enemy. Which one do you pick today? I choose to be kind to myself today!
I am sitting here with a smile on my face thinking about what I am going to do special for myself today. Below is my dream day.
- Think of happy thoughts all day and every time an unhappy thought pops into my head simply say, “No drama today.”
- Make myself a healthy and delicious breakfast. My favorite pancake recipe:
- ¼ Cup of Cottage Cheese
- 1 Egg
- ¼ Cup of uncooked Oatmeal
- 2 tbls. of water
- 1 Cup of Yogurt
- 1 Cup of Cut Up Fruit
Mix the cottage cheese, egg, oatmeal and water together. Pour the mixture into a frying pan and cook over a low heat. When pancake is cooked put it on a plate, add the yogurt and fruit. Enjoy!
- Work for half a day.
- Make myself a healthy salad for lunch. I always add cooked vegetables to a mixed green salad, protein, rice and salad dressing. For dessert I have fruit.
- Buy myself a small gift.
- Take a leisurely walk with a good friend along the Princeton Canal. Make sure we laugh a lot.
- Meet friends for dinner.
- Take a nice long bubble bath.
- Read a book and go to sleep early.
Doesn’t that sound like a special day? No DRAMA and being kind to myself all day long.
Please share your dream day with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community. Together let’s create “BE Kind to You Day.” Looking forward to hearing about your special day.
Helen
All the strength you need
to achieve anything
is within you.
~ Sara Henerson
Question: What steps do you take when a client constantly cancels their scheduled coaching sessions and wants to reschedule?
Answer: The important thing to remember, this is not about you! Following are some of the steps I take in determining whether we are a good match or the client is not ready for coaching or some situation has to be worked out:
- Email the client expressing your concern for their well-being and the importance of scheduling time to chat.
- Call the client on the day and time scheduled.
- During the session always follow the client’s agenda. NEVER, NEVER put them on the defensive or feel something is wrong with them.
- Coach the client in discovering what is holding them back from moving forward.
- Coach the client in making a determination as to whether coaching is a good fit for them.
- Always act as the coach and remember this is not about you.
- End the conversation in a positive and upbeat manner.
Sometimes I find the client is experiencing some blocks that are stopping them from moving forward. Other times they are not ready for coaching and it would be in their best interest to see a therapist. We are all human beings and at any one time we are journeying through different experiences.
Having these conversations usually enables the client and myself to discover what works best for both of us. Taking a risk and communicating with others is always the best solution.
Please share with the Love Yourself – It Matters Community what plan works best for you when a client is always cancelling and rescheduling their appointments. Let’s support each other in growing our businesses.
Helen
Written on May 12th, 2011 by Virginia Ramirezno comments
Skyrocket Your Business in 30 Days – While Having Coffee with Helen
What three things do you
want to accomplish this year?
Write them down and place them
on your refrigerator
for inspiration all year long.
~ Anonymous
I was flipping thru inspirational quotes to find the right one for today’s message. When I came across the quote above, it made me think about what three things I wanted to accomplish in 2011.
The last 3 ½ months have flown by quickly. My biggest accomplishment was writing and having a book published. This was a longtime dream that after many attempts finally became a reality. The name of the book is Skyrocket Your Business in 30 Days – While Having Coffee with Helen.
After celebrating the publication of the book, I kept thinking “What is next?”
With time on my hands, I decided to think about the next three things I wanted to accomplish in the remaining 7 ½ months of 2011. Below is the exercise that helped me discover my next three goals for 2011.
- Close your eyes and ground yourself by taking five deep breaths and releasing them. When taking the breaths let the warm sunshine fill your body. While releasing the breaths let go of your negative feelings and thoughts.
- Picture yourself just relaxing in your favorite spot. Mine is sitting under a big tree feeling warm and cozy with a blanket wrapped around me.
- Think about three things you would like to accomplish by the end of 2011. They are only ideas and nothing is written in stone. My ideas were:
- Celebrate with family and friends the publication of my book by having a big party and inviting everyone I know.
- Facilitate a seminar, “Skyrocket Your Business in 30 Days – While Having Coffee with Helen” in different coffee shops.
- Get ready to move to the NJ Shore area.
- Let all the thoughts and ideas disappear into the Universe.
- At the count of 5 open your eyes and sit quietly for a few minutes.
- When ready write down all your ideas.
- Chose which three goals you would like to accomplish by the end of 2011. The three goals I chose are listed in step 3.
Now it is Your Turn:
Complete the exercise above to determine what three things you want to accomplish by the end of 2011. Once you have determined which goals you would like to accomplish, “Write them down and place them on your refrigerator for inspiration all year long.” Also, feel free to share your three goals for 2011 in the comment section of this blog. Let the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community know what three things you would like to accomplish. We are all here to support each other.
Helen
“There comes a time in a man’s life
when to get where he has to go
-if there are no doors or windows-
he walks through a wall.”
~ Bernard Malamud
Do you find yourself many times walking through walls? Look at it this way, we are still moving forward.
This has been my pattern lately. Nothing seems to be flowing easily. I seem to be always pushing. It takes a lot of energy and I am constantly tired.
What is a person to do? There has to be a better way.
Let’s dissect this dilemma. What is really going on? The word that pops into my mind is “CONTROL” and not trusting the process. Does this sound familiar?
It might sound crazy, but I find that “Control” gives me a sense of comfort. When I just let things happen in a way it is scary because it may not turn out the way I want. When I am in this space I start to make lists, plan my every move and just control everything around me. This kind of behavior is very taxing and tiring.
When you find yourself controlling everything relax and implement the following exercise:
- Sit in a chair where it is quiet, where no one is around to bother you. It is amazing how peace and quiet gives you a sense of security.
- Take 5 deep breaths and just let yourself unwind.
- Ask yourself the following questions:
- What am I afraid of? Example: New clients will take advantage of my programs.
- What is the worst thing that could happen? Example: I will have to close my business.
- What benefit could you receive from this happening? Find something that lights my fire and makes me exciting again.
- What is really going on? Example: My Company is thriving.
- What can you tell yourself when your insecurities become apparent? “Just for today everything is running smoothly and trust the process.”
- Take 5 deep breaths and just relax for a few minutes.
- When you are ready at the count of 5 opens your eyes.
What I learned from this exercise: When I find myself trying to control everything it is time to uncover what is going on.
Now it is your turn!
Take the time to relax and complete the exercise above. What did you learn? Please share your thoughts with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community. Looking forward to hearing from you.
Helen
“Opportunity is missed by most people
because it is dressed in overalls
and looks like hard work.”
~ Thomas Alva Edison
Thomas Alva Edison put it so elegantly that we overlook many opportunities because we have to be the action force behind every opportunity.
Sometimes it is okay to let the Universe provide instead of constantly running after our dreams.
Let me tell you a little story… Sandy (name changed) was running a non-profit organization, constantly networking and applying for grants. She believed you had to push yourself to the limit before receiving any compensation for your hard work. So every day she was working 10 to 12 hour days and did not have any type of personal life.
Sandy’s outlook on life was dismal because she was working all the time and not enjoying the other aspects of her life. One day she complained to her sister that she had to work all the time and would never have time to relax and enjoy herself again.
Her sister understood exactly what she was saying and suggested she start working with a coach. Feeling overwhelmed she called me.
We started working together and explored her beliefs. Sandy strongly felt that hard work was her mission in life.
We started looking at other options. Eventually, Sandy became aware of opportunities that were just presenting themselves. She had a very creative and dedicated staff and gave them the freedom to succeed.
Sandy at first was shocked that she did not have to be the driving force behind the non-profit. Gradually, she gave herself permission to start looking at ways to enjoy her life. Today she is just a member of the team and enjoys the other aspects of her life.
Giving up control and letting other opportunities present themselves is freeing.
What aspect of your life is holding you back?
Below is an exercise that will enable you to create more freedom in your life.
- Take out your journal and write about the aspect of your life you would like to change. Example: I have to work 10 to 12 hours a day in order for my business to be successful.
- Reread what you have written.
- Start punching holes through your ideas by continually asking yourself, “What is the truth?” Example: Idea – my employees might make mistakes and everything will fall apart. What is the truth? Others are just as creative and sometimes have better ideas than I do.
- Pick one idea you would like to change. Example: I have to stay in the office until 7:00pm in case anyone calls.
- Chose an action step to change your idea. Example: Survey for a week how many calls are received after 5:00pm. Then decided if you have to change the receptionist hours or just let the voicemail take messages.
- Continue taking action steps to change your thinking.
Remember…Once we become aware of what is happening, decide to take a risk and then action steps, everything slowly changes. Enjoy the journey!
Please partner with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community by sharing your ideas and challenges. Together we will make a difference in our businesses and lives.
“We have a mental block inside us
that stops us from earning more
than we think we are worth.
If we want to earn more in reality,
we have to upgrade our self-concept.”
~ Brian Tracy
After reading Brian Tracy’s quote what were you thinking? Do the following thoughts sound familiar?
- Is this the reason I am not making money?
- How do I change my thinking?
- I knew all along it was my thinking that was stopping me.
The thoughts can go on and on.
Okay, let’s take a step back and see what is really happening here. Most of us are always looking for a solution to a problem. Wouldn’t it be easy to change our thinking and our problems would disappear?
What I am learning is that sometimes I am my own worst enemy. My thoughts start telling me all crazy ideas. When this happens I take a deep breath, picture a STOP sign and tell myself “I am worthy of being paid for my services because I am a great coach.”
Brian Tracy’s quote sounds so simple and at the same time upgrading our self-concept can be a very difficult task. How do you go about it?
Helen’s mind is at work… Below is a simple plan you can follow:
- Go into a room with a mirror and close the door.
- Take a deep breath and look into the mirror.
- Say the following words out loud:
- “I am a special person.”
- “I am providing a service.”
- Repeat these two sentences three times. The first time with your eyes closed, second time looking at your nose and the last time look into your eyes. As you continue this exercise it will get easier.
- Repeat this exercise for a week and then only look in your eyes while saying the two sentences out loud.
After a month of reassuring yourself that you are a special person and providing a service, your attitude will change.
While practicing this exercise please stay in touch with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community. We are in this together and by supporting each other things will change.
Keep in touch!
Helen
Love is the Answer
“Love is, above all, the gift of oneself.”
~ Jean Anouilh
Today is Valentine’s Day and everyone is thinking about whom they love and who loves them. Are you forgetting the most important person, “YOU?”
Many years ago, I received an email stating the benefits of acknowledging yourself on Valentine’s Day. At first thinking how selfish, it made me think of how we always forget ourselves. Everyone comes first!
One night last week I was out with a friend and we decided after dinner to walk around the mall. It was very crowded and most people were carrying shopping bags. We were saying, how commercial Valentine’s Day had become and people were probably buying gifts for their loved ones. He then made a comment, “Why don’t they buy something for themselves?” We then decided to buy something for ourselves and each other. It was fun.
What are you going to do special for yourself today?
I am going to write myself a love letter!
Dear Helen,
I want to thank you for your kindness and understanding of all the times your negative thoughts had us spinning. You always acknowledged the thought and turned it into a positive way of thinking.
Your love of life, warmth, smile and personality always makes people feel comfortable and special. What a special gift you are giving to your family, friends and business partners.
Love Yourself Coaching has been a vehicle for you to support coaches in building prosperous businesses while loving themselves. Working together with your clients you have seen them take giant steps and find happiness within themselves.
I love you and enjoy your special day!
Helen
Now it is your time to take out that piece of paper and write yourself a love letter thanking “YOU” for who you are and the wonderful gifts you give to others. The letter can be for your eyes only. Be honest and go for it.
I want to thank you all for being part of the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community. You certainly have made a difference in my life.
Love,
Helen
“Change your thoughts and change your world.”
Norman Vincent Peale
Do you wake up every morning and think today is going to be a good day? That is the true meaning of positive thinking.
Each morning as I open my eyes I hear Alice, my cat, meowing in a piercing sound. She wants to eat!
Getting out of bed quickly so she stops, my thoughts turn to my day. I have programed myself to think about what is happening and 3 things I want to accomplish. This exercise works for me and I feel motivated instantly.
You may ask me, “How can I start changing my thoughts in the morning?” Being honest, it does take time. Below are a few steps you can take to start the process:
· After opening your eyes in the morning give yourself a big hug
· Picture yourself sitting in a warm place feeling peaceful
· Say out loud or to yourself 3 things you are grateful for
· Think about your day and one nice thing you are going to do for yourself
Continue this exercise every morning for a week and see what happens.
Please let me know if you are feeling better in the morning and motivated to start your day. As Norman Vincent Peale says, “Change your thoughts and change your world.”
I am looking forward to hearing from you.
“If you see yourself as prosperous, you will be.
If you see yourself as continually hard up,
that is exactly what you will be.”
Robert Collier
I read quotes about thinking positively all the time. The message shouted loud and clear is to think that way so you will attract desired results. Okay, give me a break!
Sometimes things just happen, your mind takes over and we jump into the negativity pot. I hate to say it, but sometimes a negative thought feels good. You don’t have to act happy. Feel grateful and it allows your negative feelings to emerge. We sometimes need a break!!
Where has it been proven that if you think negatively you will only receive undesirable results? If you have any evidence of this happening please let me know.
Okay it is time for me to get off my soap box.
Thinking and feeling positive has its benefits.
- My world brightens
- I have more energy
- Opportunities start to materialize
- People want to be with me
- I like myself better
I can spend a whole day writing down all the benefits of thinking positively. Therefore, it is true that when you visualize yourself as thriving, you will be.
Please let me know what your thoughts are regarding thinking negatively or positively. I am looking forward to hearing from you.
“You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own, and you know what you know.
And you are the one who’ll decide where you’ll go.”
Dr. Seuss
What direction are you steering yourself? We are the action force behind our success and journey.
It is so easy to say, “I am working so hard and my business is not where I want it to be.” This certainly can be your reality. On the other hand, things are happening which you could have not imagined say a few months ago.
My dream was to have a team of professionals working with me who were dedicated to the success of Love Yourself Coaching. Gradually, I connected with different professionals whose dedication and skills are increasing my business productivity. My motto is, “Be open to possibilities.”
Now it is your turn!
What is your dream? As Dr. Seuss says, “You can steer yourself any direction you choose. And you are the one who’ll decide where you’ll go.”
Some simple steps you can follow to get started:
- Write about your dream. Make it real and that it is already happening. Example: My business is growing and as of today I have 10 clients.
- How are you feeling? Example: Successful, happy and fulfilled.
- Everyday read or write about your dream. It will keep you focused and open to possibilities.
Please share with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community. Together we can support each other.
Helen
“Be like a postage stamp –
stick to one thing till you get there.
Sheila Graham
Do you wake-up in the morning with the idea you are going to accomplish certain tasks? Then as the day proceeds you never take action towards any of these projects.
Welcome to the world of the entrepreneur!
This morning getting out of bed, I started thinking about my to-do list. My day started walking with my neighbor, straightening the house, answering emails, coaching clients and all of a sudden I looked at the clock and it was noon. To my utter surprise I did not start any of the projects that were on my to-do list. This pattern happens a lot.
What is a person to do?
Thinking about this challenge, all of a sudden the “Smart Goal” Model popped into my head. Below is the model:
S = Be very specific
Example: My goals were write an article, research different writing groups, coach clients, food shop, take time to just relax and the list goes on and on.
M = Measure your progress
Example: My measurement would be completion of the different projects.
A = Achievable
Example: This plan was not achievable, no way could I accomplish everything in one day.
R = Reasonable
Example: Since all the items were not easily accomplished in one day, I would create a realistic
plan. This plan would be produced by reviewing my goals and choosing which items could be accomplished in a reasonable amount of time.
T = Time Table
Example: Today’s Schedule:
1:00pm – Write Article
3:00pm – Food Shop
4:00pm – Spent time with Jeffrey, my grandson relaxing
6:00pm – Coach last client for the day.
Tomorrow:
8:00am – Research writing groups
10:00am – Create a new plan
This arrangement sounded realistic.
Please share with the Love Yourself – It Matters! Community your challenges about creating a reasonable daily plan. I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Helen
Filed under Business Tips, Coaches, Life Issues
Tags:Achieving Goals, Coaches, Coaching, feeling empowered, love yourself, Mini-Vacation, positive thinking, professional, responsibility, self-confidence, SMART Goals, struggles
Last month I celebrated my birthday. As the day was approaching this sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach got stronger. I started thinking what did I accomplish this past year? Of course my inner dialogue shouted, “NOTHING!!”
After struggling with this negative thought process for a few days, I decide to call a friend. To my good fortune she picked up the phone. After relaying my story, she started to laugh and asked who I was talking about. The Helen she knew was a beautiful giving person and successful business owner.
As we continued speaking, I started coming out of my funk, admitted the great things I accomplished and the amazing life changes my clients achieved.
Sometimes all we need is a good friend who listens and is supportive. Eventually we will put our Gremlins to sleep and bask in our greatness.
When you are having one of those days feeling your business will never flourish. Pick up the phone and call a caring friend or leave a comment on the Love Yourself – It Matters! Blog.
My commitment is that I will get back to you and support you in finding your true greatness.
Enjoy your greatness!
Helen
P.S. I had a beautiful birthday.
As I sit in my office, watching the birds and black squirrel eat from the birdfeeders; it reminds me of how I use to eat compulsively. It is amazing how after eight years of eating healthy and using quantity control it still bothers me watching others eat. I can never forget the fact my disease is doing push-ups in a corner and waiting for the right moment to act out with a vengeance.
I was thinking about this situation and realized I could continue being obsessed with the fact that watching the birds made me feel uncomfortable or look at the situation in a different way. I could watch the birds and appreciate their beautiful colors and acknowledge how lucky I am to have so many different types of birds in my backyard.
As far as the squirrel, named Oscar, watching him gave me motivation and confidence to pursue my dreams. Oscar is very persistent and never gives up until he manages to eat from every birdfeeder until they are empty. He appears early in the morning and gorges himself until he is full. Then he runs around, chasing the birds and disappears until evening. Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed with life I think of Oscar, how nothing stops him from finding food and always plays after he eats. I have been working hard this week inputting information into a database and at the end of the day felt exhausted. I got into bed one night and thought there had to be an easier way. I started thinking about Oscar and how persistent he was and always took time to have fun. Made a decision, I would be like Oscar, to continue pursing my dream and also take a mini-vacation every day at 3:00pm.
A mini-vacation is taking at least 10 minutes for myself to do whatever made me happy. By taking the time for myself eliminates stress and is a great motivator. Everyday at 3:00pm for at least 10 minutes I either took a walk, read a book or called a friend. It is amazing how much better I felt and had renewed energy.
What mini-vacation for at least 10 minutes would you like to take everyday? Please let me know.
FOLLOW YOUR BLISS
by Steve Goodier
Author Joseph Campbell often talked about “following your bliss.” I heard of a bus driver in Chicago who does just that. He sings while he drives. That’s right… sings! And I don’t mean he sings softly to himself, either. He sings so that the whole bus can hear! All day long he drives and sings.
He was once interviewed on Chicago television. He said that he is not actually a bus driver. “I’m a professional singer,” he asserted. “I only drive the bus to get a captive audience every single day.
His “bliss” is not driving a bus, though that may be a source of enjoyment for some people. His bliss is singing. And the supervisors at the Chicago Transit Authority are perfectly happy about the whole arrangement. You see, people line up to ride his bus. They even let other busses pass by so they can ride with the “singing bus driver.” They love it!
Here is a man who believes he knows why he was put here on earth. For him, it is to make people happy. And the more he sings, the more people he makes happy! He has found a way to align his purpose in living with his occupation. By following his bliss, he is actually living the kind of life he believes he was meant to live.
Not everybody can identify a purpose in life. But when you do, and when you pursue it, you will be living the kind of life you feel you were meant to live. And what’s more, you will be happy.
I love reading this story; it helps me realize that there is no specific way of achieving your dream. Normally, I would think of a singer performing at a concert and here he is singing on a bus.
After traveling on my life’s journey, I have found my inner passion is to see other people smile and feel good about themselves. The way I fulfill this passion is to coach individuals who are tired of struggling with food and want to get off the Diet Merry-Go-Round and into a vibrant life.
What is your inner passion and how are you fulfilling your dream? Please let me know.
“We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves.”
– Orison Swett Marden
Whenever we have the thought, “When I lose weight, my life will be different” automatically puts your life on hold.
Are you willing to try a little experiment and see what happens?
• For five minutes each day, make a list of all the things you like about yourself.
• Continue this exercise for the next 21 days.
• Every Friday for the next three weeks email me at www.theloveyourselfcoach.blogspot.com five things you like about yourself.
It has been proven over and over again by making this list you will focus on your special qualities and start feeling good about yourself instead of waiting until you lose weight.
I tried this exercise for 21 days, my thinking changed and started to take better care of myself. At first it was hard thinking and writing, “What I liked about myself” and then as time went along it got easier. One of the tools that really helped me was a commitment I made to a friend, on Fridays I would send her my list. The first week was the hardest because I felt I was bragging about myself and when I got her email thanking me I felt better. The second and third week got easier.
Have FUN and together holding hands we will run down the path of SELF-LOVE.
April 5th
What I like about myself
1. I am very friendly and easy to talk to.
2. I feel very pretty and like the way I look.
3. I take very good care of myself by eating healthy and exercising.
4. I am a great coach and help women realize how fantastic they are.
5. I am working on being a better wife and partner.
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